We might as well talk about Scarlett Johansson‘s enormous boobs.  Yes, she is a little pudgy.  But seriously.  She’s rich, she’s curvy, and she probably would even blow you.  At least once or twice, then she would be like all other women and pretend like she forgot how to do oral.

Paris Hilton is really a little too skinny for my tastes.  But if she wants to strut around in a bikini and shower in public, I’m willing to watch.

I went to see the new James Bond movie Casino Royale last night.  It was pretty good.  Plenty of hot chicks in it.  In fact, I’ve created my own page as a tribute to all the chicks…including Eva Green, Caterina Murino, and Ivana Milicevic.

Katie Price knew exactly what she was doing when she went pantiless and spread her legs in her car for this upskirt shot.  She saw how famous it made Spears and Lohan, and she figured she would try it.

I have recently hired a hitman.  He is large, doesn’t say much, and wears creaky shoes.  His job is to kill the goob in the photos here with Jennifer Love Hewitt.  After that – I MAKE MY MOVE!!  Jennifer loves me, she just doesn’t know it yet.

Prior JLH posts:
Jennifer Love Hewitt – Hang Out Those Boobs
Jennifer Love Hewitt and the Case of the Bouncing Boobies
Jennifer Love Hewitt (short skirt)
Jennifer Love Hewitt (gold lame’)

Aishwarya Rai is in deep doo-doo for licking some guys tonsils on-screen.  The news story:

BHOPAL, India – A kissing scene from a movie starring Bollywood actors Aishwarya Rai and Hrithik Roshan has irked a lawyer who has filed a criminal case against them, accusing them of obscenity, he said on Sunday. Shailendra Dwivedi of Indore, near Bhopal, the capital of central Madhya Pradesh state, said the scene from the movie, titled “Dhoom 2,” lowered the dignity of Indian women and gave an obscene message to youth. “Bollywood actors are conveying vulgarity in the society,” Dwivedi told Reuters. “These films cannot be watched with our families, they are so vulgar at times.” A local court accepted Dwivedi’s petition to punish the actors and said it would hear the petitioner on December 11. The Indian censor board, which certifies all films, released the movie with a “parental discretion” certificate. A majority of Indians frown upon intimacy in public.

Believe me, Aishwarya is so hot, the entire continent of India will probably foam at the mouth at the very thought of her no longer smiling, jiggling, or licking on screen.  Previous Aishwarya Rai post.

Sophie Marceau has breasts that seem to change size pretty frequently.  For instance, here Sophie’s boobs seem medium sized

And here they seem quite large:

If she were in bed with me, I’d probably suckle her nips so hard that we could easily explain the size difference. But she hasn’t been in bed with me, and I haven’t been suckling her boobs. So go figure.

Katie Price was in the news today.  She is starting her own line of lingerie or some goofy crap like that.  Listen sweety, take some advice from Bert the old Pervert.  Make your money with your smoking body and your sweet snatch.  Don’t buy too many Mercedes Convertibles or big screen plasmas, just save your dough.  Then retire.  Don’t be starting up all this lingerie crap, we just want to see you naked. 

Jeezum crow. Honestly, those boobs are huge.

Dayum, does Britney Spears have some gigantic melons or what?  Some pathetic hornball crept through the bushes and hid out in a restaurant dumpster to get this photo.  Why the F he didn’t wait until she was flashing her underwear I’ll never know.

You might as well enjoy looking at Salma Hayeks boobs.  Everyone else does.  Even Salma enjoys looking at her boobs.  She stands around at home checking them out in the mirror, giving them a heft, a tug, a swat, telling herself “I like my boobs.  They are cool and they give me wood.”

Okay, here’s the scoop.  I’m not hatin, just trying to tell you how it is.  You guys/gals know Tito Ortiz?  He’s the dude on UFC that tries to beat people up, but really only succeeds on Frank Shamrock.  Uh, and a few dozen other dudes.  Per month.  Anyway, he’s gay.  That’s right, you heard it here.  He’s a queerbait fudgepacker.  Not that’s there’s anything wrong with that.  I know that he’s queer because I used to work with Tito.  He and I worked at Kmart together when we were teenagers.  One time he got sick because he sucked down a kingsize blueberry slurpee while we were on break.  But I digress.  Tito is gay, and he has enlisted the help of this chick to help camoflage the fact that he likes beefcake.  The chick is Jenna Jameson.  Jenna is now supposedly dating Tito Ortiz.  One time they were over at my house, and Tito whispered something in Jenna’s pretty, perfect, angelic ear and cupped her breast and I punched him right in the solar plexus and told him – I said: GET OFF MY WOMAN.  I know all about the solar plexus cause the Marine Corps taught me how to pull a Chuck Norris on whoopass central.

How tall is Jeri Ryan? Some of you Ryan geeks are bound to know. I can just see her wrapping those long legs around me and letting those giganto boobs wobble too and fro in my face on the couch while I’m probing the deep wetness while sipping on a glass of cherry koolaid.

More Jeri Ryan posts: http://www.regularpervert.com/blog/?s=ryan

She knows what she does to us.  Keeley Hazell was born to makes us twitch and shake our units behind our computer screens.  She would be working as a Hooters waitress if not for the internet.  Instead, she drives a Porsche and has a full time masseuse.

Jenna Jameson, the queen of porn, and Jenny McCarthy, the queen of every kid’s wet dream in the 1990′s, are glamming it up at this soire’.  The way they pose and flirt, you think to yourself… wouldn’t it be fun to watch them nibble on each other’s thighs?  Do a little clit licking?  By the way Jenna, your nipples is hanging out.

About Cindy Margolis, Tyler says:

I pretty much ignored her before but now I like to pretend that we sometimes go on tandem bike rides down by the lake and have picnics.  And feed the ducks.  And she’s all like, “oohhh, the ducks are so cute – look theres a baby!”  And I’m all like, “so do you do anal or what?”  And she would get real turned on and we would do it.

http://wwtdd.com/post.phtml?pk=1531

I’ve been stroking it to internet babe Cindy Margolis since I was old enough to stroke it.  Cindy and my strokes predate the internet man – I was humping my hand back when she was posing for Frederick’s of Hollywood and I was stealing them out of the mailbox and taking them into the bathroom before my mom could fetch them.  With this month’s issue of Playboy, she has finally fixed probelmo numero uno:  she refused to get completely naked.  Here is all her stuff, excuse me while I pleasure myself.