You haven’t heard from me all day because I’ve been busy in the bathroom masturbating with a bar of Ivory Soap and a laptop with 16.2gb of photos and vidoes of . She makes me that horny. If I had a choice between humping a wet and spread Jenna Jameson or shaking my shoookie to Jessica Alba, I’d pick Jess. Here’s why: Rocking the Ass-bah, She Loves Her Ass, Yummy Nipples.