Jennifer Love Hewitt has an amazing rack. Look at those things wiggle and jiggle!

Yep, coming soon to a news stand near you are the bare boobs of Britney Spears…

News story:

Operation removes lightbulb from anus

We got a big boob’d mamma, a horny spanish lady, and…

And yes, sweetie, all bruthas have big units like that. Just because he has jailhouse tats and a 12″ dick doesn’t mean he’s any better than me. (4 movies)

Megan is hot enough to burn water. I’m gonna go to sleep tonight thinking about her.

Soccer Babe Gallery

Hey, I don’t know what the F is going on here, but I know it appears to involve corn on the cob going into the old vadge.  I personally would never stick corn on the cob in my twitty-twat, but then again I don’t have a twitty-twat.

Oh, Jenna Jameson… I would even eat your toejam if you asked me to.  You know how everybody owns those fancy LCD and plasma TV’s?  I got none of those, I’m too poor.  My trailer does come equipped with an old console model TV that has a remote control connected to it with a wire. The color is so-so, but it does a great job of showing me all of Jenna’s creases and crevices when I watch her porn.  I especially like exotic and erotic use of the Jenna Dildo.  More on that later.

Tera Patrick looks very edible in red satin:

Previous Tera posts here and here and here

For some reason, the name Regina always makes me think of “vagina“.  So if I get introduced to some lady named Regina, one of three things will invariably happen.  1) I’ll snicker.  2) I’ll pop up half a woodrow.  3) I’ll have a battlefield flashback and immediately smell that lovely musky scent that we all know as odor de twat.  In this case, Regina (vagina) is the proud owner of a magnificent pair of boobies.

You know you’re in the pervert fold when watching a chick humping and moaning a machine gets you turned on.  Hey, I can’t help it, I’m a pervert.  If Crissy wants to maturbate on the Sybian, more power to her.  Gotta love the “O” face!

To further my fun post about sex underwater, enjoy these photos:

Outdoor pool - naked brunette

Redhead - indoor pool

I was a recent participant in underwater sex.  It was not without its challenges.  The young lady and myself went to this fancy resort on Mexico, and we went Scuba diving after learning the ropes very briefly from an “instructor”.  The next day we had the opportunity to grab scuba gear and slip into a pool all by ourselves for a little naughty action.  Let me give you some tips.

- Foreplay underwater is difficult.  Think about it, you can’t really kiss her on the lips, nibble on her neck, or doing any of those activities you can usually count on to get her all rev’d up.  If you’re lucky, you’ve got a gal that’s all horny and excited just to be getting the groove on with you.

- Lubrication for underwater sex tends to disappear.  Even if your girl is rev’d up and horny, she may not stay “wet” for long.  That sounds like an anachronism, why wouldn’t she be wet if she’s underwater?  The point is, her natural lubrication will tend to wash away.  But hey, that rough sex feeling ain’t so bad.

- Sex positions underwater take on a new definition.  What is missionary style if you’re bonking face masks and regulators?  No good.  Girl on top, guy on bottom (ie woman superior position) would be great.  The normally fantastic view of your girl’s boobs this offer is only enhanced by the straps she’s wearing for the scuba tank.  Yum yum, watch those perky boobs wave around underwater!  But it’s kind of hard to get any leverage in this position, and with your tank and everything else on you can’t get comfortable.  No good.  We settled on doggie style.  Doggie style underwater required us to actually remove her tank and lay it on the pool bottom, otherwise it was enough for me to knock myself out on during vigorous thrusting. Read the rest of this entry »

So do you guys think Paris Hilton’s boobs are natural?  I mean, I’m assuming that if she were going to get a boob job she would get them bigger than that.  So they aren’t fake, right?  Should she get fake boobs?  Seriously, if they were just a little bigger, her breasts would be more attractive.  She’s rich, so it doesn’t really matter, but preferences are preferences.

My quest to see Jessica Simpson naked is likely going to fail.  She just ain’t gonna do it.  I would like to see her lying face down on the ratty carpet of my trailer with the golden globes of her ass popped up in the air waiting for the meatstick that all ladies know and love that belongs to… (sound the trumpets) Bert the Pervert.

Pamela Anderson is always worth a gander.  Her career hasn’t really been going anywhere lately, but honestly how can you top Baywatch?

Here’s an amateur chick who is a) boneworthy, b) willing to do something with you.  Finding one without the other leads to nothing but frustrations, Daniel-san.

click for page two of this girl… Read the rest of this entry »