I had a bad dream about an old girlfriend last night.  I dreamed that I suspected she was cheating on me and I was conflicted about how to catch her and deal with it.  In the meantime, I was trying to get laid regularly (of course).  But she thought that I thought that she was cheating on me, so things weren’t going too well.  So she like bit my johnson while giving me oral, and then we went to a baseball game with her family and I had to try and pretend we were getting along even though she was cheating on me and had just tried to pull a Lorena Bobbitt and give me a penectomy.

There is a lesson to be learned here.  Not only are girlfriends very stressful, even ex-girlfriends can be very stressful.